Beltane - the Musical -- a ritual by Circle Shalee

When I attend public rituals, I have high expectations. They should be participatory and powerful. Things should happen. Energy should be raised. Being experienced in creating ritual, I also appreciate creativity in rituals. I was not disappointed when I attended the latest Full Moon Celebration sponsored by Circles in the Woods CUUPs and presented by Circle Shalee. They crafted their ritual from familiar popular songs, from I'd Like To Teach the World to Sing by the New Seekers to Ring of Fire by Johnny Cash to Singing in the Rain by Gene Kelly. They passed out copies of the lyrics and we all sang along. For the working we had a spiral dance to Abracadabra by Steve Miller.
Between the words of the songs, the emotional context of my own history with these songs, the general theme of Beltane, and the repeated reference to fire, this was a powerful experience for me. Especially during the spiral dance in which I could not participate physically, fire energy rose in me, not surprising with the lyrics, "Every time you call my name I heat up like a burning flame, Burning flame full of desire. Kiss me baby, let the fire get higher." As we dismissed the West with Raindrops Keep Fallin' on My Head by B. J. Thomas, the words, "Because I'm free - Nothing's worrying me!" strike me at a deep psychic and spiritual level. This seems like the preparation for words in our Circle opening from With Arms Wide Open by Creed, "Well I just heard the news today, It seems my life is gonna change."
All this brought me to a profound and sweeping realization. Over the last few years I have been undergoing such drastic changes. Most people fear change, but I welcome it and seek it. Much change has already happened but more is coming and I grow impatient for it. Furthermore, the coming changes are not only within me but in my life, from my immediate sphere of influence and working outward. Much of the psychic and emotional pain that I have been experiencing comes from standing on the brink of such changes with every oracle I've consulted and every fiber of my being saying, "The longed-for changes are imminent." Nevertheless, the change has not come. It feels like balancing on the edge of a knife, not a comfortable place to stay. Still other of my emotional pain comes from the inability of others to accept the changes that have been happening in me. I would prefer to maintain and develop both my existing and new friendships, but I can't stand still just because some of them can't accept me as I grow and change.
After the ritual, while I was standing in line for the "covered dish" supper, an attractive lady came up to the elderly gentleman in line in front of me to speak to him and say goodbye before she left. I was just standing there, perhaps staring a little, thinking about having seen her at other Full Moon Celebrations and noting that, although we had never talked, nonverbal cues had given me a favorable impression of her. Furthermore, I thought that the next time I saw her at another event I should try to make her acquaintance. Then, without any warning she introduced herself to me which definitely threw me off balance. Although I responded by telling her my regular name and my Cherokee name and I tried to repeat her name to myself to remember it, I was so befuddled that I forgot it anyway.
For the rest of the time that my sister and I were there, I noticed that several females seemed inexplicably drawn toward my presence. I don't think this was an illusion, but it is something for which my life has not prepared me. Other men may find such things common occurrences, but I never have. I am still trying to process these experiences.